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    3/1/2008

    以后

    今天刚好全天休息,躺在海边想了些以后的事。
    以后,和以后的以后,可能的话,我想少生些病,有更多的时间去户外走走,听听鸟鸣,看看晚霞。
    我希望最后能在一个听得见海浪的岸边有一间很小的房子,狭小的空间却让人感觉温暖。周围有环绕的公共绿地和小土坡,有参天古树。出门就能望到白帆和天水之间。
    一间房用来堆书,朝西,因为我更倾向于在午后傍晚之间的时间里看书,而那时候眼光刚好不那么强烈。
    卧室朝东,处于我想来厌恶睡懒觉的习惯,而且我更觉得清晨睁开双眼能触摸天光会让一整天都心情舒畅。
    客厅的落地窗朝南,拉开玻璃就会遇见清新的海风,这一年每当我住在有这样房间的旅店里时,都会觉得世界已经与我无关。
    我的客厅没有电视,没有多余的陈设,我只想铺上暖色的地毯,挂上鲜活的壁画和简单的吊灯。
    储藏和播放那些电影和音乐的屋子被挤到了北边,没有窗,有我自己设计的灯泡和墙纸,有永不破音的便宜音箱和薄得贴到墙上的显示器。
    我甚至自私到没有去考虑未来的孩子,因为我怕他会不喜欢我的设计,每个人在孩提时代都有只属于自己的美好童话,对于我可能是塞尔达,可能是玛丽,但它们可能已经不适合我的孩子。
    可能还会一些小橱,用来存放过去,希望可以坐那辆列车回到二零四六,把所有记忆都用麻袋装回来。
    我希望从城市回家就只有一条路,路边有麦田。
    当然,以前的想法更奢侈一些,觉得自己的房子应该在黄昏停留时间更长的小镇。
    最后想到的几个词语是“走过庭院”,似乎是Kevin Kern的第一张钢琴CD的名字,也让我想到了《漫长的婚约》最后一个镜头,生命在色彩斑斓的画面里安静流淌。

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